Welcome to Purifier...

Appreciating the fact that I'm on this side of the door...

    My name is Adam Mitchell Schubert, but you can call me Adam Bomb 💣. I just turned 32, and I live in Denver, Colorado. I'm a musician, a gamer, and a cat lover. I had a fantastic childhood, I love my family, and until the last couple years, everything was going pretty smoothly for me. But I think it's pretty rare to get through an entire lifetime without a little trauma...

    Five days ago, I was admitted to the ER for extreme vomiting, diarrhea, dizziness, etc. It was the 3rd of such episodes in the last few months, and by far the worst. For at least a brief moment, I thought that was it. I felt like I was dying. Luckily, I wasn't, but my body was telling me something. Something big. If didn't make some massive changes to my lifestyle right away, I was going to be in deep shit. 

I've been an insanely heavy smoker since I was about twelve or thirteen years old. I fell in love with cigarettes and marijuana long before I ever fell in love with a woman. I'll never forget the first time I smoked a cigarette; I was so dizzy that my friends had to hold me up, but for some reason, I liked it. I was fascinated with the idea that my stream of consciousness could be altered, and I wanted more. Soon after, I discovered cannabis and alcohol, and man oh man, was I in heaven. 

Over the years, I tried it all. Opium, MDMA, prescription drugs, cocaine, mushrooms, LCD... you name it. Heroin and meth are the only things I never had the desire to do, more so out of fear than a lack of curiosity. Nothing ever stuck like the nicotine and THC, thankfully. But as my tolerances for those two grew, so did my intake; slow and steady, until last week when I ended up on a gurney.

It's ironic, because now, I'm so incredibly grateful to have my regular stream back. In the past week of being sober, I have experienced more intense emotions than I ever did on any drug. THC has been proven to mess with the way you process emotions, and let me tell you... that shit is real. Within just a day or two of quitting, I started to have the most insanely vivid nightmares, from which I would wake up in cold sweats, dizziness, and a very uncomfortable feeling that involves serious brain fog and sometimes even the inability to speak.

But I think I'm through the worst of it now, and I'm committed to not only staying sober, but to sharing my experience with the world, in the hopes that maybe just one of you will be impacted by these words. Although I truly feel that this time is different, and that I'm truly ready to take on health (which includes a complete 180 of my diet, and that thing called "exercise"), there are going to be rough seas ahead. Nicotine is actually my most stubborn addiction, and I imagine quitting is going to be something like wrestling a Tyrannosaurus rex.

But we'll get there. Together. It might be ugly, dark, and at times, seemingly hopeless... but I hope we can come out on the other side of this hazy tunnel with a sense of absolute purification 🌟.

Welcome to Purifier. Make yourself at home... 🏡💜